i stay

Who did you kiss you have lip stick on your lips who did you kiss why do you have that look on your face somebody sat on your face why do you have that look on your face why is … Continue reading →

you would never know

You would never know

By seeing me

You would never know

By talking to me

You ask me how I am

I reply with a smile

I’m fine, how are you?

You would never know

By seeing me

You would never know

By talking to me

I always put on a smile

I always laugh with you

But you would never know

By seeing me

By talking to me

That I just lost my little brother

You would never know

How often I cry myself to sleep

But you would never know

That my heart is broken into two

You would never know

How much I wish I was dreaming

But you would never know

Because when you ask me

How I am

I reply with a smile

I’m fine and you?

You would never know

How much I miss my brother

How much I wish to talk to him

Hear his voice

His laughter

Watch him do his silly dance

But you would never know

Because for you

I always put a smile on my face

And go on about my day

It will a year real soon

And you would have never

Known until you have read this

The grass is never greener on the other side

Don’t be jealous of me

Don’t envy what I have

Because all I have is

A fake smile on my face

I put on for you

When you ask me

How I am?

You would never know

By seeing me

You would never know

By talking to me

That my life has changed

Forever

My little brother

Has been gone

For a year

And there is nothing I can do

Expect put on a smile for you

And say, I’m fine and you?

 

 

 

prince charming…

Where is my prince charming?

does he exist?

I guess I wouldn’t know

I have no life

I don’t go anywhere

I don’t do anything

Can he just knock at my door

and present himself

to me

prince charming

can you come find me!!

32…

 

32 years on earth

what have i learned?

people you love, pass away and there is nothing you can do about the pain or the void.

people who told you they loved you, admit to using you to fulfill themselves and their needs. it sucks being used by someone who told you they loved you.

people who you thought were your closest friends, turn out to be not your friends and there is nothing you can do about it whats done is done

the guy who you thought was the sweetest guy turns out to be the complete opposite of what you thought.

what i learn in my 32 years on this earth is life ain’t all it cracked up to be, life is full of pain and bull shits that you have no control over. what you have control over is yourself and the rest …well its bull shit that you don’t need in your life.  Mya Angelou wrote a poem that said no one can make it here alone. and though that may be true, but the world is full of bull shit right now, its better to be on your own.

poor girl

You did to her what you did to me

you said to her what you said to me

you used her like you used me

you hurt her like you hurt me

you lied to her like you lied to me

when will you learn…

poor girl, just like me

she had to learn the hard way

that you’re up to no good

be strong poor girl like me

there will come a time

when all the pain and hurt will cast away

and he will get his karama

when he will have someone do to him

what he did to us

be strong

poor girl like me

he did to you what he did to me

poor girl

just like me

FINALLY!

Known each other for quite sometime,

Kinda knew there was something there

But never really sure.

Afraid of making a fool of myself

Afraid of rejections,

It was better to keep quite

Hide your feelings

Hide your emotions

That’s what they teach you to do

But I always kinda knew

There was something there

And finally

Finally you got the nerve to ask

What you had or I had always wanted

Finally

It was pretty good

Kinda wanted more

But I understood

There won’t be  any tomorrow

But now I’m sitting here with a smile on my face

Thinking, did that really happened

I kinda want more now though

But I’m glad,

Finally,

Finally, it happened

Knock at your door…

I know death
I’ve known it for some time now
but never understood
its extent
until it came knocking at
my front door
now I can fully
confidentially say
I know death
the pain
the sorrow
the grief
that comes with
when death comes knocking
at your front door.
its different than the death
i have came to know
when it was knocking at
my friends door
this is the death
that i had feared for
it came knocking
at my front door
there is nothing you can say
that i have not said to you
when it was your door that got
knocked down
but i did not realize
it is different
when its your own door
that it knocked on.